As I glance through the pages of a book I'm reading, I learn one crucial aspect of human interaction that is worth observing and modulating.
These four words have lighted up my cerebrum
Criticism, Complain, Compliment, Praise
These words can wound or heal
They can pierce or cover
They build or destroy
Regardless of reason or explanation
When these words are used to describe the actions of another or how one feels about the result of an action they can be considered as positive for the purposes of communicating respect and resolution needed.
However when they are consistently used to describe a person's character; with implication of feelings of disgust, utter displeasure at the person and not necessarily the actions - they point to a deep-seated-unresolved-unattended-unaccepted issues.
Examples paraphrased from book on seven principles for making marriage work
Complaint: There's no fuel in the car. Why didn't you fill it up like you said you would ?
Criticism: Why can't you ever remember anything? I told you a thousand times to fill up the tank, and you didn't.
Complaint: You should have asked me before inviting anyone over for dinner. I wanted to spend time alone with you tonight.
Criticism: Why do you keep putting your friends ahead of me? I always come last on your list. We were supposed to have dinner alone tonight.
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